Bondage and BDSM has been thrust into the spotlight thanks to the world wide success of Book Series "Fifty Shades of Grey" “. Bondage is the tying, binding or restraining of a person for sexual or psychological pleasure for the people involved. BDSM refers to a variety of practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing and restraint. From handcuffs, to spanking, to getting tied up, after ’50 Shades Of Grey’ launched, every man who had read the book – or even just heard about it - felt it okay to admit to enjoying a few of Bondage and BDSM’s naughty pleasures – and mainstream culture started accepting Bondage, BDSM, S&M, or whatever else you want to call it – as not just being about whips, chains and medieval torture.
Safe word.Just like other risqué or new sexual endeavours, before you and your partner try any kind of bondage or BDSM, ALWAYS agree on a safe word. A safe word makes allows your submissive mate to put a halt to the proceedings if it all becomes too much for them to handle. When you and your mate are picking a safe word, pick something that you wouldn’t normally scream when having sex. PLAY recommends ricotta cheese, I mean, who on earth says that during sex?
If you and your partner want to go a little more hard-core and make your bondage and BDSM sessions more intense with some bounding and gagging, but you might want to introduce a safe signal.
Spanking.Spanking is probably the easiest way to introduce the concept of bondage into your relationship. If your taking your man doggy style, or he’s riding you on top just casually slap his arse, if he acts shocked and revolted just pretend it was an accident. If you see a cheeky smile on his face, continue the spanking.
Slapping.Give him a soft slap on the face mid thrust and see how he responds – just be careful not to slap him too hard and leave a mark!
Tied up.Hand cuffs, rope, chains, even your silk sheets, there are a lot of options when it comes to tying up your partner. Trust is very important when it comes to being tied up. Your mate needs to be sure you’re not going to leave him tied up to make some lunch or watch sports. So be respectful enough to make him some lunch too. In all seriousness, capitalise on the fact that he let you tie him up, treat him with respect (unless he asks you not too) and you’ll be having a lot of fun quite often.
Know your boundaries.You and your partner might have different boundaries. You might be a pro, he might be a beginner, or vice-versa. Whatever the situation, agree on some boundaries before you get started, and more importantly, abide by them.
Be prepared.Handcuffs, ropes, spanking paddles, masks. Make sure you know your equipment before you get started! Last thing you need is a call to the fire department to get your partner cut out of her handcuffs.
Get creative. Take a creative approach to bondage. Clingfilm can be used to wrap around your lover’s wrists, and if you use a single layer, it’s easy enough to snap.
Be sober. We all agree, most of the time tipsy sex is great sex! And you and your partner are more likely to get a little funky in the bedroom 3-4 drinks in – BUT it’s a good idea not to try bondage for the first time when you’re under the influence of alcohol, as you might misjudge how tightly to tie the knots.
Fastest way to learn the basics...When it comes to learning bondage sex acts in the bedroom it is important toke your time and take things slowly. The odds are bondage and fetish acts are new to both you and your partner so it is important that you both feel extremely comfortable in everything you are both experimenting with.